CAIN’S OFFERING

the dark notes

Do you ever get the overwhelming urge to do something stupid or utterly unnecessary, like say wash your hands with antibacterial gel for the tenth time in a row or scratch and pinch at your skin where there is no itch; the urge so strong you’re certain you might lose your mind if you don’t indulge, if you don’t give in?

Well, I feel like that all the time, and sometimes it’s the little things: spending hours furling and unfurling my serviette till it’s a perfect triangle while my food goes cold, cleaning pencil smudges in my sketchpad until I would have ripped up entire sheets with the incessant scrubbing of eraser against paper, having thirty pairs of boxer-shorts so I can change them at least four times during the day; the little things my family views with slight irritation, and for which people make fun of me at school…

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